Happy 30th Anniversary Popsy

I am so much in love with you Popsy
time has fly so fast
that I didn't so much
notice the years that has gone so fast
and now we are celebrating our 30th year
as married couple

It was as if it was just yesterday
when we first met
and now the years
has keep us so much in love still
with each other
through thick and thin
you are there for me

Still so much in love

Kerygma Conference 2019

Hi my friend I just attended the 2019 Kerygma Conference at the SMX Convention Center at MOA which lasted for 4 days with Bro Bo Sanchez and his team . It was a truly amazing experience . Knowing God's word and message for you is a unique experience.

 I attended varied talks : Investing the Millenial Way , Health - Depression and Anxiety , on high blood pressure , Toolbox of the Rich, Can ordinary people become leaders , among others .

Of course I also attended the plenary talks with Bro Bo Sanchez, Bro James , Bro Arun and a lot more of the  Kerygma speakers .

See you next year ...

A day with Alonzo at the Dinosaur Island Clark

Hi everyone so happy last Saturday ...got to spend the day with baby Alonzo. He was so amaze with the dinosaur's eggs. Initially seems scared with the giant dinosaurs but when he got the feel of it he was so happy . He keep coming back to the dinosaur's eggs playing hide and seek . It was truly amazing spending such a grand and jolly time with this kid. He is so adorable and responsive .

Hoping to having another grand day with our baby Alonzo...while he is so young ....because pretty soon when he gets bigger he will have other interests in his life . 

Wanting

 I tried to escape from the hurt
by sleeping it off
but I wasn't able to sleep the whole night
my eyes were close but my thoughts 
      was very much awake
 four letters in a row and all unanswered
i don't want to confront you and make demands
it will mean forcing you to do something
      just to please my whims

I needed reassurance from you
after what my Dad did to you
I don't know what's going on in your mind
have you changed your mind,
     your heart perhaps ?

it's all

questionings
and as usual , unanswered by you
again , i have to wait for your time
waiting , it's a never ending process

as if nothing really change
it's still the same feelings of aloneness
there are many fears i have
     in my heart

that i can't even seem to settle
i don't know where to go to ask for help
i feel i can not count on you
i can't seem to face my own feelings
my fears are eating me up

am i being selfish
but i am only asking a little of your time
perhaps even just 15 minutes
for you to write a short missive

how can i be sure of your feelings
when i don't feel secured?
will i always be the one to take
      the initiative ?
to write that letter , make that phone call

i think it should be a two way street
busy?
i am also busy but  i go out of my way
    to have time for you

i tried to understand you
by making all sorts of rationalization
but after sometime
i can't anymore take it - the neglect

 i guess love isn't enough
if i would be feeling like this
we better cut off the relationship now
to save me from much heart

a wise old man once said
"unhappiness comes from unfulfilled expectations "
i just have to be contented that you
     once loved me too

i felt lost
and yet there was no way done
to clear the cobwebs in my mind ?
when you are always not available

you don't have to be here physically
 i tried to turn to you
but there was no response
why ?

in my heart , it will always be you
but i can intellectualize my feelings
i know i can not hide from the pain
but i really couldn't take anymore
          the neglect

i think i can't wait anymore for the time
you'll have time for me
but i am still happy
God gave me the chance to know your
      feelings for me

and i want you to be happy
even if that means leaving you
         alone with yourself

i needed your comforting words
and all i hear is a deafening silence
i can see the shadows in the dark
           dancing again
perhaps it is there, where they really belong

i want to be a part of your life
but i feel more like an ornament

still a puzzle

Christmas is almost here
and yet got no special someone
to whom
i could offer
even a stick of lollipops

where are you
when i needed you most
will i be able
to see you this Christmas
it is still
a big puzzle

but of course , i'll try
i really want to go
and see you

but how about her
is she beautiful
perhaps i better not
and let my dreams
be dreams forever

When Will My Turn Be ?

damn this feeling
why did you took for granted my feelings ?
i tried to understand you
but what about me ?
when will my turn be ?
when will someone listen to me ?
i also deserve a shoulder i could lean on,
    a listening ear

sometimes i don't really understand
but i listen
i can not understand myself alone
i need you to process me and
 my questions , doubts and confusion

do I really belong where I am needed ?

Thinking of You again

do  you understand my feelings for you ?
or are you puzzled (just like me )?
but the initiative must come from you
are you getting the point i'm driving at ?
like the truth that hurts

i hope
you're not blind
but i can't really blame you
since we live in two different worlds

maybe when i'll sleep tonight
i'll be thinking of you again
i wonder
how come i never grew tired of you ?
every day it's the same painful reality
and yet ... i still go on