Endless Questions

i am here in my twilight zone
dancing with the shadows in the dark
trying to reach an illusion
playing with the memories
and staring at the night sky

but the dreams
just fade away in the night
it hurts
to see the illusion
shattered into pieces, into distant dreams

when can i get hold of that touch
and see pain turn into ecstasy?
truth hurts
it is eating me up
nothing change

it is still all rationalization
a never ending coping
it never ends, like a cycle
like going in circles
it never stops - the pain

when will the shadows
  stop dancing in the dark ?
when will i see crystal clear water ?
i am so dried up
i need a break
i need to see light in all these things

i think
i can not wait anymore
it has to be now
the story has to end to begin
to begin what ?

it is so shattering
i am all mixed up
i am muddled with all sorts of feelings
till i got to be passive
and be totally numb

i couldn't even cry
i don't even feel
what is this ?
am i in Uranus now ?
trying to find my way in space

i am floating now
but could i ....
wait forever ?
there's a limit
but where is the limit ?

there is a noise
in the room
telling a story
in a form
of a song

down memory lane
with the old songs
what songs will i play ?
a song about life's darkest secrets
there is pain everywhere

can i still take some more ?
i need a shoulder
but all i can see
are skeletons
in the closet

it is fear i know
and instead of pocketing them
i am facing them
in the mirror of reality
and i did not like the reflection i see